Coop Scoop Oct 14: The Big Bang Edition
The Coop Scoop: The Big Bang Edition
October 14, 2020
Issue #41
“Fatter than three double Macs. More full of crap than a sewage plant. Able to walk down small ramps in a single bound without falling. Look! Up on the dais. It’s a turd. It’s a shame. It’s StuporTrump! Yes, it’s StuporTrump – a strange visitor from another dimension who came to Earth with lies and deceits far beyond those of mortal men. StuporTrump – who can almost speak Russian, who can bend a pipe cleaner with his tiny hands and who, disguised as President, a ‘roid raged chief executive for a diseased nation, fights a never-ending battle for himself, himself, and himself!”
That’s right. That’s our boy. Just one small detail. He has already lost his re-election and soon enough he might have to learn to bend steel bars to get out of the clink.
The absolutely frenetic, head-spinning, pinballing of Trump from the debate to the hospital to the Mussolini balcony, to his string of sweaty, packed with fanatics COVID-laced rallies this week in some of the most diseased parts of America, his truly pathological tweets as a President literally telling California and New York to go to hell have not even the most remote connection to a campaign or political strategy. There is no team of seasoned advisors back in D.C. even trying to set a rational course.
The White House itself is an eerie ghost ship. Anybody with any sense was long ago purged or fired. His latest campaign manager was checked into a psych ward. His new manager is down with COVID. His twisted gremlin of a personal lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, has now descended full time into pushing Russian conspiracy theories and apart from Fox can’t even get a TV booking on the Spike channel (if it still exists).
Prince Jared and nobody else has the President’s ear but Jared can only mumble and burble and essentially fail at every task except using his position to further enrich himself.
Republican Senators are hiding under their desks preparing for the Big Bang on November 3 and may still cut Trump loose in the final Days. Note the pathetically weak but still significant public murmurings critical of Trump this week from Mitt Romney.
The long-awaited October Surprise in which Commandant Barr would dramatically unveil the so-called Durham Report indicting Hillary, Obama, Comey and Brennan – for what? Burning the Reichstag?-- has quietly fizzled out for lack of any evidence drawing yet another tweeted potshot from the Boss Man.
The Coney Barrett hearings are doing nothing for the president except allowing Democrats hours of airtime to warnthe nation of the horrors the Ice Lady will impose in the years to come as she unblinkingly applies her extremist and heartless dogmas. Though the entire show has the nation of Japan rethinking the deeper meanings of Kabuki. Trump’s childish, escalating attacks on Dr. Fauci have all the appeal of a Banana Split in a diabetes clinic.
Meanwhile a Green Wave washes through the country, harbinger of a bigger Blue Wave to follow. Every, and I mean every single action, appearance, speech, or tweet from the President instantly and magically produces a tsunami of donations to Democrats.
Millions upon millions are flooding the coffers of Democratic challengers in once solid-red states from Alaska to South Carolina and everywhere in between. The battleground map is now expanding faster than Trump’s waistline.
Democratic Senate candidate Jamie Harrison in South Carolina was blessed with an astronomic $57 million in just the last quarter, almost 100% from small donors i.e. enthusiastic voters. The execrable incumbent, Lindsay Graham is struggling to stay even in the polls and recently went on the tube to literally beg for money. Hopefully, he will soon be on the streets with a tin cup full of pencils.
In almost every presidential election cycle there is a so-called last-minute crash. Usually late in the campaign, like in the last week or five days, when there is a generalized “break” of undecideds, fence-straddlers, the ill-informed, the less enthusiastic voters all go in one direction or the other, effectively deciding the election early.
Sometimes it comes very early… like when Mondale said he would raise taxes 4 months before the 1984 election. Or more dramatically, in September 2008 the day Lehmann Bros. drowned igniting the financial crisis that instantly immolated John McCain.
Mike Madrid, former offical of the California Republican Party, and now chief data cruncher for the anti-Trump Lincoln Project, posits that the crash and break already happened…specifically the combined mad debate with Trump’s whole COVID spectacle, effectively sunk Trump’s re-elect. All that remains is the paperwork… and, of course, the perilous aftermath. And the Barrett hearings, which were supposed to block out the COVID issue at this crucial moment, have only showcased to America the glaring dysfunction and callous opportunism of the senate GOP who ought to be coming up with a broad, meaningful COVID relief package instead of stage managing this pre-determined dance with Trump’s puppet… all while millions are already voting!
I fully agree with Mike’s take. In most national polls Biden has maintained a wide margin that is growing and stabilizing, not shrinking. Trump keeps splashing around in the mid to low 40’s and is trailing in every traditional battleground state as well as struggling not to lose a whole new second tier that hints at a larger political re-alignment.
Nate Silver of Fivethirtyeight.com remarked in this week’s forecast podcast that he is surprised that the margin between the two campaign is not yet narrowing as one would expect. Instead, he said, it is “flattening,” that is to say the gap is holding extraordinarily steady.
I am not a clairvoyant, and neither is Silver, but I agree with him when he says he sees zip, nothing, nada, on the horizon of the next 20 days to reverse this downward spiral of Trump.
This raises the obvious question of why Trump has insisted on what is clearly a self-defeating strategy of doing nothing but riling up and rallying like a cokehead with his hardest core supporters that do nothing to win over a single new vote (but they sure help the Democrats)? He reportedly has in-person rallies skedded for almost every day till November 3, with multiple rallies in one day during the last week.
I think it’s an easy answer. He doesn’t know how to do anything else. And moreover, he has nothing to say to anybody outside those crowds who clap and bark like a chorus of trained seals. You don’t really think he could efficiently message to the middle, or to those “suburban women” to whom he pleaded “please like me” when he claims, as he did last night, we “have turned the corner on COVID.”
Pick your metaphor: I’ll go with the golden oldie that Trump is but a dying cockroach in a bottle. I don’t know but I have to suspect even he knows he’ll never get out.
The constant base rallies are nothing but his morphine. And once you start seriously, you need constant hits to keep going. They are the only remedy, albeit temporary, for his fear, depression and helplessness. His only succor in such a cruel, unfair and biased world unworthy of his greatness. The only venue where he can bathe in unrequited worship and adoration. And in between them, he must retreat to either the lonely gloom of Air Force One or the White House, both of which now are but his dual political hospices (and the White House facility has a new patient, Trump's young son Barron, now diagnosed positive for the virus).
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Trump’s collapse coincides perfectly with a chilling upsurge in the pandemic he has stoked. As he struts onstage assuring people that the danger has passed, we are in this same week seeing some 40 states or more with a marked increase in infections.
Nationally, we are back up to the staggering count of 50,000 cases or more per day which by 4th grade math works out to about 1.5 million per month! Wisconsin has now opened a field hospital as it runs out of ICU’s. The Dakotas have no available hospital beds. Epidemiologists are now predicting a death toll as high as 500,000 by February. And, yes, children, are also being diagnosed with covid – more than 75,000 of them—as the flat-earthers are still demanding we open all schools.
Unfortunately, and I mean VERY unfortunately, there IS A LOGIC to not knocking down COVID. Vastly under-reported due to the Barrett hearings, the Trump White House has now formally adopted the let-em-die strategy of herd immunity. A fringe idea just weeks ago, it is now the centerpiece of national “strategy.”
It’s simple in its concept: allow as many people as possible to become infected so that the country become generally immune. The only other country who has formally adopted this crackpot idea is Sweden, where it has failed and caused a death rate many, many times the multiple of the rest of Europe.
